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there are no “what-ifs” with God…

August 10, 2011

with it being august already, i have been thinking a lot about all our summer has held.  over all, we’ve had a wonderful, fun-filled summer.

we went on vacation and went on some weekend trips to visit loved ones.  we’ve had play dates with friends and lots of time outside.

most of all, we’ve had a lot of freedom and little structure.  with the kids getting a little older, no babies in the house and no diapers, it’s been so much easier to just drop everything and go have fun.

and yet, over the course of the summer, my mind has been plagued with “what-ifs”.

what if i don’t get the last of my planning done before we start school?”

what if i don’t have a good schedule mapped out for us before the school year starts?”

what if i am so depressed some days that i can’t bring myself to teach school?”

and the list goes on.

we have a fun weekend with friends ahead of us this week, and yet i have been walking around feeling guilty for going and having fun….because “what if i don’t get things done here at home?????”

this morning during my time with the Lord, i felt him gently remind me of who i am in him.  and i felt him showing me that he is not a God of “what ifs”.

he is “I Am” and there are absolutely NO uncertainties where God is concerned.

none whatsoever.

i realized this morning that by walking around in the world of “what ifs” i have been taking my focus off of God and relying on myself.

by realizing where i’ve gotten off course, i can now look at things differently.

i can look at the truth that my HOPE is in Christ and that his grace is sufficient for me.

i can look at the truth that because God has called me to homeschool, he WILL give me what i need, even if it means lowering my own expectations of myself.

and if there are days where i feel as though i just can’t make myself teach my kids, then i can use that day as a way to show my kids that mommy needs a break and that mommy needs Jesus to give her rest.  and just maybe we’ll have a movie day with mommy occasionally rather than trying to plow through.

i’m letting go of the guilt for preparing to have fun with friends this weekend.  God gave me these friends and he gave us this summer and i totally believe he would want me to enjoy this time rather than allow the “what-ifs” to steal my joy.

and let’s face it, the enemy likes nothing better than to fill our minds with “what ifs”, because by doing so, he is drawing our attention away from the One who is our solid Foundation.

Lamentations 3:22-23

New International Version (NIV)

22 Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
23 They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.

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