a wandering heart……
Sometimes i think it would be easier if God just dropped a brick on my head in order to get my attention.
i mean, seriously, i can stray so far from what i know is true. all it takes is a stressful morning with the kids or an annoying conversation with the insurance company to get me spinning in a downward motion.
i had decided to take some time this morning to get away for some “mommy refueling time”. i packed up my laptop, my Bible, and a couple of books and went to my favorite place to unwind: Starbucks.
when i left, i was discouraged about various things that had taken place in the past week…issues with kids, annoyng conversations w/the insurance company, and the fact that i’m missing my hubby like crazy these days.( tax season is almost over though–yippee!)
as i sat at Starbucks sipping my soy peppermint mocha, i began to feel myself unwinding. i read a few uplifting emails and then began to read Colossians. it was while i was reading Colossians that i began to feel God speaking to my heart, showing me things in His Word that i had been neglecting to see, things that i seemed to have forgotten.
He began to show me that i have taken my focus off of Him and have replaced him with my circumstances. i have in fact been seeing my circumstances as being bigger than my God.
He helped me to see that as soon as i begin to focus on how heavy things seem to be right now, i forget that His burden is light.
Matthew 11:29-30 ~
29Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”
He also helped me to see that i have been relying on my own understanding, rather than acknowledging Him and allowing Him to direct my paths.
as i sat there in Starbucks trying to process all that God was showing me, i was completely humbled. i was reminded of this verse from the song, “Come Thou Fount”:
O to grace how great a debtor
daily I’m constrained to be!
Let thy goodness, like a fetter,
bind my wandering heart to thee.
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,
prone to leave the God I love;
here’s my heart, O take and seal it,
seal it for thy courts above.
That verse is totally what i want….i want God’s goodness, like a fetter, to bind my wandering heart to Him. I want Him to take my heart and seal it for his courts above.