things are tough right now. financially, especially. we didn’t expect to need a new van, or to have numerous things break down, totally depleting our savings. then you add in buying school curriculum and me desperately needing new glasses now, unless i don’t really need to read the street signs. we’ve basically been hit with a season of “when it rains it pours”.
i thought i was doing ok with all of it and just figured God would work it all out just like always. until i talked to greg last night and realized how grim things really are. i knew he was stressed out over the finances, i could see it in his mood every night these past few weeks. but last night seemed to be his breaking point. he sat down after the kids went to bed and stressfully re-figured our budget, reducing a lot of the areas, just so we could break even. and that didn’t even leave room for savings. i’m ashamed to admit that i hadn’t really been taking him seriously lately when he would “worry” over the finances. ijust blew it off and figured he was just worrying for nothing and that “this to would pass”. but last night was different. last night i was able to really see into the heart of this man God has given me, and my heart broke for him. for the first time in a long time, i was aware of the tremendous responsiblity that he has on his shoulders. the fact that he has 7 people to provide for isn’t something i think about often. i just take for granted the fact that he takes care of us and don’t even give it a second thought.
as we talked last night i could feel myself becoming anxious over our situation and doubting wether or not God would come through. it was easy to say that God would come through, but it was another thing to actually believe it.
during my quiet time this morning, the Lord brought me to the book of Jeremiah, chapter 32. verse 40 says this, “I will make with them an everlasting covenant, i will not turn away from doing good to them.” i then went on to ready chapter 33, verse 3: “call to me and i will answer you, and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known.”
that last verse really stood out to me. i felt as though God was telling me that even though so many details are hidden from us right now regarding our financial future, that He has great things that He will reveal to us in His time. i found comfort in knowing that He knows the unknown things that are hidden from us and that he will answer when we call out to him. even when i don’t “feel” his presence, i can lean on the promises in his word and reflect on what he’s already done in my life. i can also find comfort in the fact that i have indeed tasted and KNOW that the Lord is good.
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